You Can't Always Get What You Want
by PleaseforPeace
Summary: Rey and Finn have been best friends for at least four years now, they met junior year of college. Currently, they live in New York City, in a small apartment where they both struggle to survive- and try find out who they are and what they want.
1. Chapter 1

"I don't understand why he never responds to my texts," Rey mutters at her phone, as if willing it to respond for her.

"Because he is a _tool_ ," Finn quips helpfully behind her, seated at the kitchen table, in the process of writing on his very successful, very popular blog.

Rey twists on the couch, moving to get a more comfortable view of her roommate typing furiously at his MacBook, "he's really not _that_ bad, he does have his moments." Otherwise she wouldn't tolerate him, well, not completely anyway. They had a sort of, booty-call, one-night stand – not so one night stand thing going on.

Finn squints at the screen, sighs in frustration, and slams the lid shut. "He is a _tool_ because he clearly doesn't realize _how lucky_ he is to have you!" He takes off his glasses and places them off to the side, rubbing his forehead in irritation.

Rey smiles at his comment, nonetheless, it is nice to have _somebody_ who thinks she is great- even if he was completely uninterested in her, or women in general. Noticing his frustration, her smile fades away, "what's wrong?"

He stands up and begins fretting in the kitchen cabinets, which makes Rey jump up because Finn has no talent for cooking. They still don't talk about the Grilled Cheese Incident. He gives her a small smile as she takes the box of rice from him, "just… This idiot on the internet, who insists that _all_ of my reviews of film are either _inaccurate_ or utter nonsense."

"Sounds like a tool," Rey quips, brow frowning, "scoot over," she taps his side in order to gain access to the pans.

"A _total_ , pretentious tool," Finn agrees, moving to sit down again. "I honestly think that he is just trying to fight, he always picks out the tiniest detail and twists my words against me."

"I can see where that can be frustrating," she nods, and lights the stove. She glanced over her shoulder, "is fried rice ok?"

Finn looks dreamily at her, "I don't deserve you."

Rey turns about and points the spatula at her best friend, "yes, yes you do."

Rey and Finn met junior year of college, and simply just _clicked_ completely with each other. Four years, and two years living together, they complimented each other perfectly. Which was a blessing, as they lived together in a small, but quaint apartment in New York City. Neither of them had yet found their dream job, or even a job relating to the degree that they received in college... But it didn't mean they weren't trying.

"Damn," she muttered as she looked in the fridge, to find among its sparse contents an empty egg carton. "Can you run to the store and buy some eggs, please?"

Finn hops up, pulling on his jacket, "no problem," he makes his way over to kiss her cheek, "be back in a jiffy."

"Jiffy?" she scoffs on his way out the door, "nobody says that anymore!"

* * *

"They must be crazy!" Finn's voice yells over the phone, so loud that she cringes against it.

"Yeah, well, they're lunatics because they let me go," she grumbles into the phone, pressed between her ear and shoulder. She tosses a bag of chips into her cart, giving a weak smile at the old woman who almost crashes her shopping cart into hers. "I don't know what I'm going to do Finn! I was already behind on the rent money this month…"

Finn groans on the other line, "I _know_ and I wish I could say I could cover for you- "

"Don't even, you know I don't expect that!"

"But I would!" he insists on the other line, the sound of keys on the other line. Finn was a secretary for a small law firm, which he said was slowly killing him. "Listen, I can ask around, if you need something."

She nods, throwing a few more things in her cart before moving for the checkout, "if it is not too much of a hassle, I would _really_ appreciate it."

The sound of keys pauses, "no hassle, I'll call when I find something."

"You're best Finn!"

"I try," and the line goes dead.

* * *

She's on her way out, carrying a bag of _regrets_ or comfort food, when her phone buzzes. She pauses, frantically digging into her large purse, surprised that Finn could've found something so fast. She finds it and answers it without much thought, "hello?"

There is silence on the other end. "Hello?" she repeats.

"Uhhh, you called me?" a deep voice resonates on the other line hesitantly.

"Shit – "she had forgotten that she, in a moment of weakness, had called _him_. It was right after she got fired, feeling incredibly frustrated at not being able to properly yell at her boss… And they remembering what else frustrated her, that stupid boy that never texted her back. She adjusts the phone, cradling it to her ear, "uhh, yeah, um… I was wondering what you were up to?"

Rey squeezes her eyes shut, cringing inside at that horrible excuse. Now that she had a good few hours to calm down, and he had called her when her guard was down, this was just an awkward excuse for a conversation.

There is a long pause, "umm, nothing, the usual." There is another long pause, where Rey really can't articulate anything to say. So, he carries on, "did you want to come over?"

She recalls the last time she came over, and shakes her head. But for some reason she says, "yeah, sure."

"Ok… See you in a bit."

And he hangs up. And Rey is left standing clutching a plastic bag full of melting icecream, three bags of different flavored chips, and a bottle of wine. Did she just agree to go over to his place? Why did she do that?

She shakes her head clear. Well, at the very least she can use this opportunity to give him a piece of her mind. Good, great.

* * *

He answers the door, and he is not wearing a shirt. "Hey, there."

She practiced this speak three times on her way here, and then once more pacing outside his door. But… his chest _and everything_ is very distracting… Her mouth feels dry, "hi."

A smirk firms on his lips, and he glances down at the bag, "you bring snacks?" He turns back into his apartment, leaving the door ajar for her to follow after. "You didn't have to," his deep voice resonates as he collapses on the couch.

Rey follows after, eyes trailing down his back to the loose jeans on his hips, "uh, yeah." Never mind that she _didn't_ buy them for him. He definitely didn't deserve them. She closes the door behind her, and pauses to take off her shoes.

The apartment is very scarce, without much warmth or a distinct lack of personal touch. The only characteristic that it really had, was that it was perfectly neat- as a pin. Which was slightly disturbing to her.

"Nice," he mutters, from the black, leather couch, his eyes watching her intently.

"So, what have you been up to?" she asks, glancing off to the side. She just feels awkward, unable to carry out her original intentions now that she is here, face to face with him.

She doesn't realize he has gotten off the couch until he is too close. So close, that she can almost feel the heat radiating off his naked skin. He grasps her wrist loosely, hand trailing down her own to take the plastic bag from her grasp, "make yourself comfortable."

Rey can breathe again when he leaves the room for the kitchen, and retreats quickly to the couch. She had forgotten why it was such a bad idea to see him person… To just pop over for a visit. It was because they almost _always_ ended up—

"What's up with the junk food?"

She shifts uncomfortably on the couch, "uh, I had a really rough day."

His head appears from the kitchen, dark curls and brown eyes, "yeah, why?"

"Well, I… Actually, I got fired today."

He crosses the room towards her, and she forces herself to tear her eyes away for a moment. Though, she can still feel his intense stare, before he pauses—hovering above her. "That really sucks."

"Yeah… it really does," she says uncommitted, as she looks back up to him. The conversation is clearly over, as neither are focused or even interested in it at this point. She licks her lips, and watches him watch _her._

He ducks down, locking her in between his two arms, leaning in with his freakishly tall person. "I'm sorry," his says, not sounding anything but distracted.

"Thanks," she mutters before closing the short distance, as he was impossibly close.

Their lips meet for a quick kiss. And then they pull away, he licks his lips and kisses her again. And it is wet, and hot, and she reaches up to tilt his face, so that their lips meet just right. From there is just heavy, his tongue pokes into her open mouth at first opportunity, and she chases him right back into his own mouth.

She moans when they part, and he kneels on the floor in front of her. He pulls her knees apart so he is centered between them, before attacking her mouth again. And it is an ongoing assault. She wraps her calves around his thighs half-heartedly, as his hands circle around her waist and under her shirt.

That's right, that is why she never comes over here. Because they always end up fucking.

* * *

"You _didn't_ ," comes the accusatory tone from her best friend. Rey put her head in her hands, shaking her head at the kitchen table. "You _did_. You fucking _fucked him._ Rey!"

She groans, pushing her plate of scrambled eggs and toast away, "it wasn't on purpose!"

An amused eyebrow raise, "not on purpose? Did his dick just fall into your— "

"Finn, please! I went over to yell at him for being a _tool_."

"That worked well."

She pouted at his smirk. "Did I mention that he is unfairly sexy?"

He nodded sagely, taking a bite of his toast, "yes, yes… He also sounds like a serial killer. You say he is insanely neat, and that you've never met him outside of his place except at that one party that one time. He says weird stuff during sex… _And_ his name is _Kylo Ren._ Who is named _Kylo?"_

She shrugs her shoulders and offers, "he is?" Although, she really did need to cut off things with him because he was an asshole… At the very least. But the sex wasn't _horrible_. It was… ok. And it relieved, it definitely relieved some tension yesterday.

"Speaking of serial killers," Finn segues after a few minutes of silence, "I have to ask you something."

Caught out of her own daydream, she looks back to her friend and nods, "shoot."

"So, you remember that guy I was talking about yesterday online— "

"The tool."

"Exactly. Well, I got a message today, and he wants to meet."

Rey nods slowly, "he's from around here?"

"Yeah, I guess so…" Finn looks uncomfortable, then leans forward, "I don't have any idea who he is, what he looks like, I just know that his name is Poe."

"And that he's a tool."

"Yeah."

Rey watches her friend slowly evolve into a huge puppy, damn, he was using those puppy eyes again. She already knew where this was going. "So, you want me to tag along, on this little meet up to make sure you don't potentially get yourself killed…."

Finn nods eagerly, reaching to touch her hand, "yes, _please_ , I'm too young to die."

She rolls her eyes at his dramatics.

"Plus, I really want to see this guy… I want to give a face to the comments. And, I want to tear him apart when we met— get justice."

Rey considers how her confrontation with Ren had ended so poorly, considering that it never happened. So, maybe it was worth it to go with Finn. At the very least, at least one of them would be able to get justice.

"Alright, let's do it."

"You're a goddess."


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh my god, what if he is, like, fifty-seven years old with no teeth, and preys on young, twenty-four year olds with popular movie review blogs!"

"That… is oddly _specific,_ " Rey teases from across the table. They had decided to meet said mystery man in a fairly popular coffee shop. How _basic_. They had no idea what he looked like, since his blog was obscure, where Finn's was the opposite with a biography of himself. Finn was freaking out, needless to say, so they decided to show up an hour early in order to scope out future escape routes.

Finn glanced around, chewing on this thumbnail, "can we go? You know what, let's just go."

Rey swatted his hand away from his mouth because she was a good friend that discouraged bad habits to persist. "Will you stop freaking out! Look, you dragged me to this thing because you wanted to meet this guy!"

He drummed his fingers against the table top, "yeah, that was a week ago. Now, I'm reconsidering how valuable my life is."

"You know, there is a distinct change that he is _not_ a complete psychopath, and merely a complete movie nerd like you."

Finn groaned, "and there is a chance he is not."

"You know what sounds good right now? A coffee, I'm going to get a coffee. And you're going to sit here like the brave boy you are, and stop acting like a pre-Madonna."

She headed over for the barista, hearing the door chime behind her. She turned to see a man in a soft, brown leather jacket enter the shop, glance around and head straight for Finn. "Oh my god, he's _gorgeous._ "

* * *

"I completely disagree; I think that the fact that he changes his mind at the end of the movie does not equate to character growth or even development… There is not enough transition along the way, and it just feels blunt, messy, and unnatural."

The man, who introduced himself as Poe Dameron, shook his head in response. "I think it is supposed to leave you questioning, supposed to make you want to re-watch the movie in order to figure attempt to pinpoint where his thought process started to change."

It had already been an hour, and Rey found herself sitting between the two men who kept bouncing back in forth in a powerful debate about some movie that she had never watched. She stretched, her coffee was long gone, and she figured if Finn was going to be murdered then it would have happened already. "Well, as interesting as this is, I think I'm going to head out."

Poe, at least, has the decency to look sheepish at leaving her out of the conversation, "oh, I'm sorry… I have a tendency to get caught up— "

Collecting her bag to stand she waves away his worries, "oh, don't worry about it, I have to be on my way anyway. The job search calls."

Poe still smiles apologetically in response. Rey leans over to kiss a guilty looking Finn on the cheek. "He's _nice_ ," she whispers in his ear before heading out, which fully implies a long conversation later about said cute boy.

* * *

"What would you consider your greatest weakness to be? Why are you interested in working for our company? Can you tell us a time when you overcame a problem?"

Rey leaves the second interview of the day feeling utterly lost. While she answers the questions as well as she can, the answer is always the same. "We appreciate your time, but we are looking for someone with a little more work experience."

This is the fourteenth interview since she was fired, and she is about ready to scream with frustration. How was she supposed to get more experience, when even the lowest level jobs required more experience? It was an endless cycle of fuckery.

She was about to indulge in a _very_ large pastry from the coffee shop down the block, when a sign caught her eye. _You Break It, We Fix It_ , the slogan makes her roll her eyes, but the littering of signs of _technician needed_ catches her attention the most. She was good at fixing just about everything, electronics to even cars. Rey always had a natural curiosity about how things worked, which lead to her taking them apart and putting more painstakingly putting them back together.

Hesitantly, she entered the small shop, only to find it exploding with shelves upon shelves of _junk_. Wires hung from hooks on the ceiling, a collection of ancient VCR players was stacked to the left. The back wall was full of bright lights of all assortments from Christmas lights to a traffic light that kept changing colors. She _adored it_.

"Hello?" she called, looking for whomever this beautiful store belonged to.

There was a garbled yell from what looked to be a backroom, hidden behind a tangle of wires. She followed the sound, only to find an incredibly bushy man hunched over an old computer, with its insides ripped open. He held a flashlight between his two teeth, as he carefully began to he processes of disconnecting the damaged motherboard.

"Hello?" Rey said carefully, not wishing to fright him with her appearance. To which, he merely grunts around the flashlight and begins to reach for a pair of pliers that stretched out across the clutter. Rey picks it up, and passes it over to which he grunts, some kind of thanks. "No problem."

She waits patiently until he has delicately removed the motherboard, and is placing it off to the side in what looks like a scrap pile. He sets down the flashlight, organizing his tools which were hazardously scattered across the floor. "Can't take in any more jobs until next week—we're over short at the moment."

She shakes off his dismissal, "I didn't come here to _give_ you a job, I came here to _get_ a job."

That seems to shock him, and he turns around for the first time to properly look at her. He had full beard that seemingly had not been trimmed in quite some time. His hair was brown, and brushed back in a short, messy bun at the back of his skull. From what she could tell, he looked to be in his forties, with a hint of gray and laugh lines gracing his visible features. His brown eyes were warm, however skeptical of her statement. "A job?"

"Yes sir," she smiles, "I can fix anything."

He looks at her for a minute more, before standing up and wiping his hands on his jeans. He points to the computer that lay in pieces, "finish this job, and you can consider yourself hired."

Rey doesn't waver.

It takes her two hours to reassemble the computer, and to find and install a new motherboard that would breathe new life into the computer. Her new boss stays for the first ten minutes, before disappearing back into the mess. She stretches after two hours of concentration, cracking her stiff neck, before happily trailing out of the small room.

"Two hours, seven minutes, and thirty-eight seconds," mutters the man from across the room as she appears.

She sheepishly scratches the back of her neck, "is that bad?"

He breaks out into a smile, "not at all. Consider yourself hired."

Excitement bursts from the seams. A job, not only one that would cover the rent, but also something that she enjoyed doing. It wasn't her _dream,_ but it sure as hell was a start if not an improvement from the last one. "Thank you, sir!"

He barks a laugh, "please, it's Chewie." She takes note, deciding the name suits him just fine as he gestures her over. "Come, we will discuss the terms of your contract."

* * *

By the time Rey left the shop she was bouncing with joy. Chewie was a gruff, but warm-hearted character whom she fell into step with easily. He was honest, and although her beginning salary was fairly low, she could make much more on commission. It seemed like the world had just been lifted from her shoulders, if only for a little while. The job would suit her needs, until she found something better.

Rey walks off the adrenaline pumping through her veins, stopping only when she finds herself at a familiar destination. Instantly, she feels silly for having walked all the way here, on the completely other side of the neighborhood. She looks up at his windows, at the warm glow of light, that is becoming more prevalent as the sun sinks lower in the sky.

She feels that annoying itch to run up there, to share the news of her new employment. Suppressing the urge, she reaches for her phone and dials the number. Pacing as it rings several times before a voice crackles through, "hello?"

"Hey," she breathes, glancing up at the window, "are you home?"

There is a long pause, and then slow response, "no... Why what's up, kid?"

Her eyes narrow at the shadow that passes by the window above, "where are you then?"

"Out," he says calmly, and then after a pause, "how'd job hunting go today?"

It was obvious he was lying to her, but she couldn't confront him about it without seeming like a creeper for coming by uninvited. Worse, she didn't know _why_ he was lying to her… It wasn't like he was trying to avoid her, as he had still answered the phone (though he still refused to ever answer any texts). Different possibilities swam around her head, as she tried to regulate herself. "Good… good."

There is a hint of amusement in his voice at her vague response, "good, as in hired good?"

Her head was like a crashing ocean of confusion, anger, and just a hint of guilt that she couldn't focus on the conversation. "Yeah, yeah, I'm employed… I gotta go, so I'll tell you about it next time."

He hums in acknowledgement, his dismissal light, "alright, kid. Next time."

She taps end quickly, and breathes a deep breath before quickly putting as much distance between her and that apartment as possible.

* * *

"I'm so proud of you, Rey," Finn says again from across the couch, nursing a glass of celebratory, and insanely _cheap_ champagne.

She grins, finishing the remains of her glass, even though she has work at her new job pretty early the next morning. "Thank you, Finn." Because Finn was the sweetest friend that acted excited about even the littlest victories. She admired him from across the couch, his face in deep concentration at whatever story was unfolding on the TV screen.

"You know I hate it when you watch _me_ instead of the _movie_." As sweet as he was, Finn was a fascist when it came to films. If you weren't devoting your complete attention to certain films he deemed as _art_ it would earn you a proper scolding.

She smirked, and set her glass down on the soft throw rug below, "speaking of films, how did the rest of your date go?"

Finn reluctantly tears his head away from the screen for a moment to frown at her disapprovingly, "it wasn't a _date_."

"It seemed to be going well when I left. Did you get his number? He was cute, right?"

The boy sighed at the flood of questions, and picked up the remote to pause the movie because he _knew_ Rey. And he also knew this conversation would not be ending any time soon. "It went... _okay._ And yes, we did exchange numbers but _only_ to discuss business."

She notices his dodge of the last question, but allows it for the moment. "What sort of business?"

"Well, it occurred to us, after you left, that it was rather easy to bounce different opinions and ideas off each other. So, Poe proposed that we start a podcast that reviews different films."

" _What?_ " Rey exclaims, "a podcast? Finn, that is _amazing_!" She felt excited for him, but equally annoyed that he had kept it from her for so long… Seemingly, with no intention of bringing it up what-so-ever. She crosses her arms, "when were you going to tell me?"

He shrugs, having enough sense to look apologetic, "it's not a sure thing yet… There is a lot to discuss yet."

"Well, it still is _exciting_ news worthy of celebration," Rey chides him. She reaches for the half empty bottle of champagne and refills her glass, "a toast then, to a very successful podcast."

He gives her a small smile, and clinks his glass against hers.

"Can we return to the film now?"

"Yes you fascist."


	3. Chapter 3

The next day is wonderful. Rey wakes up early, and is refreshed with a shower and the joy of her new job. Chewie, as it turns out, is not really a morning person. However, he nods to her in greeting when she enters and directs her to the back where a heap of junk is left for her to tinker with. It is _perfect_.

In fact, everything would beperfect about this day, if it weren't for the lingering questions she had for Ren about yesterday. It wasn't as if she could really confront him about it. And she couldn't even get a second opinion from Finn either. She hadn't bothered bringing it up to the boy yesterday, as she knew exactly what his response would be—disapproval. Every time she brought Ren up he would just shut down, and insist that she stop seeing him.

" _He's bad news, Rey."_

She shook it off, pausing to retrieve her phone. Even if she couldn't talk to Finn about this, it still required a second opinion.

* * *

"It is rare for you to invite me out to lunch."

"Yes, I'm sorry we haven't gone out sooner, I just heard you arrived back in town a few days ago…"

Phasma was a few years older than Rey and Finn, but they had also met her in college. She had been a graduate student, studying for her masters in English, while also student teaching a literature course they were forced to take for credit. Phasma was a free spirit (clear from her unusual name), she wasn't tied down by debt the same way Finn and Rey were. Her parents had a sum of money, which funded her education and slightly _extravagant_ lifestyle. She had short blonde hair, and a bohemian kind of style, even now she wore a flowing dress which she claimed she got on her last trip to Florence, Italy.

"That's alright, love," she says graciously, brushing a loose strand of blonde hair behind her ear. "It is wonderful to see you, of course. How're things going?"

Rey looks down at her hands, feeling slightly embarrassed at her lack of success in the career field. "Well, I recently got a new job as a technician."

Phasma gave her a small smile, "bravo, you were always good at fixing _everything_." She takes a sip of her wine, "has Finn secretly released any films that I should know about?"

Rey shook her head, "he isn't a director quite yet, but he may be starting a podcast pretty soon."

Phasma nods, "sounds lovely." She and Finn did not really get along, their two personalities clashed too much for either to be comfortable friends. Rey knew this, but she couldn't help but adore them both equally. The woman leans forward in her chair, "now that catching up is done, are you going to tell me what you're _clearly_ itching to tell me, already?"

This was another reason why Rey adored her so much, her intuition was truly admirable. "Yes… Well, I'm not entirely sure where to start, to be honest."

"The beginning is as good of a place as any," Phasma suggests.

"Right…" And Rey goes into it, describing her practically unusual relationship with Ren.

Phasma waits patiently until the end before giving an amused chuckle. "By _weird_ sex, what exactly do you mean?"

"Well, most of the time it happens pretty fast…" Phasma smirks at that, "but sometimes he makes up these, like, scenarios… One time I was a hooker and he was a wealthy, older man who picked me up and brought me to a hotel…"

The blonde woman laughs outright at that, "sounds like the plot to _Pretty Woman._ " She shakes off Rey's worries, "role-playing in bed isn't _that_ unusual."

Rey blushes, suddenly feeling her own lack of experience. She only had two serious boyfriends, and neither of them did such a thing. "It is normal?"

Phasma shrugs, "the fantasies don't seem that far stretched… Plus, with fuck buddies, you're often more comfortable to _play_ while fucking." She picked at a perfectly manicured nail, "I once had a man ask me to wear a dog collar… He said he wanted me to bark while he fucked me from behind."

Rey stared in disbelief, "did you do it?"

The woman laughs, "of course, love! If only for the story—try everything once!"

* * *

Rey returns to her job after work, and the rest of the day is completely uneventful. After an excellent meal of spaghetti and meatballs, Rey lays, stretched out across the couch feeling content and fat. While, Finn is typing furiously away in kitchen at what she can only assume to be Poe.

"I saw Phasma today," Rey offers from the couch. She waits for some kind of acknowledgement, and continues when there is none, "I said we'd all have dinner together soon."

Finn visibly cringes and groans from behind his Macbook, " _we_ , why does there have to be a _'we'_ , Rey?" He pulls off his reading glasses to glare at her, "you _know_ how much I _hate_ her."

She sits up to face him properly, "come on, you know you don't _hate_ her."

"You're right, I _despise her_."

Rey rolls her eyes and decides on different tactic, "aren't you at all curious as to what she has been up to?"

"Not at all," Finn deadpans, shutting his laptop closed in irritation.

"She's curious about you."

"Yeah, I'm sure she is _dying_ to hear about my _enthralling_ job as a secretary." He crosses his arms over his chest, "you know she really just wants to talk about herself, share more stories about, _Oh! That one time she almost got arrested in Amsterdam for smoking too much legal marijuana!_ "

Rey frowns deeply, " _look_ , it is _only_ one dinner. She is in town for a little while, and I just think it would be really nice if _we all_ could go out together at least _once_ before she leaves again."

Finn shakes his head, "see, that isn't even the point, Rey! You _always_ make plans before _even_ asking me!"

"Because you would have said no!"

" _Exactly_!" Finn shouts, throwing his hands up in frustration. He stands up and begins collecting his things from the kitchen table, making for a retreat to his room.

Rey leans over the back of the couch to watch his retreating back, "can we at least talk about this?"

"Nope!" Finn yells down the hall, slamming his door shut behind him.

* * *

The next day, quite frankly, _sucks_. When Rey wakes up late in the morning, and Finn is long gone, so any reconciliation is out of the question. She misses the train, and is forced to hail cab to make it to work on time. The whole day, she feels sort of _off._

Rey forgot how much she hates arguing with Finn. Although their arguments were rare, it was also insanely difficult to argue with her best friend. Particularly because Finn uncommonly stubborn, an even just a little bit childish. The only comfort she got, was from pulling apart an old television and cathartically putting it back together. There was something about working with her hands that just soothed Rey, body and soul.

She doesn't stop for lunch or any breaks that day, just merely keeps moving on from project to project. It makes the day go by faster, and keeps her from fretting too much over things she cannot solve. She hated things that problems that didn't have clear solution. It made her anxious.

It wasn't until Chewie properly kicks her out, saying that he actually wants to go home sometime that night, that Rey reluctantly leaves. She stretches, cracking her stiff back and neck. The sun has already set, but she feels unwilling to return home just yet. Instead, she reaches for her phone.

* * *

"I just can't believe her!" Finn says irritably, pushing his Chinese food around with a pair of chopsticks. "She _always_ pulls shit like this. And she _knows_ how much I hate it."

Poe Dameron sits across from him, smiling ever so politely. After emailing back and forth for day, they decided that it would be easier to discuss certain matters over dinner. But, somehow, the conversation had shifted to Finn bitching about his recent fight with Rey. Dameron was infinitely patient, "it _is_ unfair," he agrees. To which Finn throws up his hands, as if to gesture, 'yeah right?' When Poe continues, "but is dinner really _that_ bad? I mean, don't you think you're overreacting just a _little bit_?"

Finn pouts, "you don't know what Phasma is like…"

Dameron laughs at the boy's sulky face, "yeah, well, I can't imagine she is any worse than my future in-laws."

His ears perk up at this, as Poe had not mentioned that he was seeing someone. That… was interesting information. Finn stuffs his face with some eel to try to balance that weird sinking feeling in his stomach. "That bad?" he offers after he finishes chewing.

Poe nods sagely, " _that_ bad. They are very old fashioned…" He picks at his own food thoughtfully, "but sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the ones you love, right?"

Finn hums, feeling chastised at Poe's honesty. He did care for Rey, and if dinner was really that important to her then it was something that a good friend should do. After a minute of silence, he glances back up at Poe's patient, knowing smile. " _Alright_ , I will at least talk to her about it…"

* * *

"What's up, kid?" Ren asks as he props open the door, shirtless _of course,_ looking down at her with soft eyes.

Rey wants to ask what's up with him, why he lied the last time they spoke, but she restrains herself. "The usual. Can I come in?"

"Yeah," he shrugs, and moves so she can enter. He watches from the doorway as she silently kicks off her shoes and heads for the living room. "How's the job?" he asks, as he turns around the shut the door. When he spins around, her shirt is on the floor and her hands are pushing down a loose pair of holey jeans. He sucks in a breath, watching her hips wiggle out as she kicks the material off to the side, "that was… quick."

She smirks at his shocked expression, satisfied at following the advice that Phasma had given her at lunch. _"Take some control over the sex— surprise him, throw him off balance, make him please_ you _."_ She reaches back for the clasp to her bra, "the job is good, I fix things…"

Ren is very slowly moving towards her, interested, "what kind of things?"

She juts out her jaw, and looks up at him, "anything," she murmurs as she releases the clasp.

By now, Ren is standing before her, and he grabs the falling straps from her shoulder. He holds them up thoughtfully, "that's… kind of hot," he says softly before kissing her.

She pushes up into the kisses, chasing his lips with hers. He rests his palms to her shoulders, slowly dragging the straps sensually down her arm. Their lips part for a moment as her bra hits the floor, and she gives into a shiver as the cool air hits her bare skin. He moves closer, crowding her person, her nipples harden slightly as their skins brush just barely with each inhale.

They stay like that for a good minute, just staring into each's eyes, before he can't seem to take it any longer. He bends down and kisses her, his hands snaking between them to cup her breasts. She moans into the kiss, feeling electric at his touch. He seems to feel it too, if the pressure against her hip is any indication.

They break away for a breath, and he buries his face in her collarbone, pressing hot kisses that trail down to her breasts. She allows him to bury his face between her breasts with a moan, although small, he doesn't seem to mind as he worships them with his hands and mouth. She feels herself grow hotter with each tease, hands buried into his scruffy hair, teasing the back of his adorably large ears. Eventually, she pulls him away, gently, and he looks up at her with a sex hazed expression. Which was hilariously similar to confusion?

"Bed," she says slowly, and it seems to take him a moment to process as he watches her lips.

In response he just nods, not tearing his eyes away... And before she realizes it, Rey is hoisted over his shoulder, screeching and laughing in utter shock as he charges for the bedroom.

* * *

The orgasm is _excellent_. It was one of the few times, while having sex that she had actually reached her peak. And Rey was content, laid completely sated against black, silk sheets. She lazily turned to watch Ren pull off the condom, tie it, and toss it in the bin to the side. He heaved out a great sigh, chest glistening with sweat, as he collapsed down next to her.

Bored, she lifted her hand to a mole on his shoulder, tracing a path between two with her fingertips. Watching in amusement, as he twitched and heaved out a loan groan into the sheets. Which, in turn made her eyes light up with mischievous curiosity, "are you _ticklish_?"

She is about to dart an assault in of his armpit, when he flips over on his side, grabbing the offending hand. " _No_ ," he says too quickly. To which Rey merely raises an eyebrow, pleased by this revelation. His eyes narrow, clearly not enjoying this as much.

There is a moment of silence, before Rey's stomach lets out a loud grumble. And she blushes red, remembering suddenly that she had skipped both lunch and breakfast today… And that she was _starving_.

Kylo laughs at the new development, "you hungry, kid?" She shakes her head, but her stomach only growls in frustration. Which only receives her another laugh from the man, as he shakes his head. "Your stomach begs to differ…" He sits up, "I don't have much, but I got enough for an omelet."

Rey is about to protest, but he is already standing up. So she watches as he finds, and pulls on his briefs that ended up on the floor somewhere. It suddenly occurs to her that— _that_ was the first time she had heard him actually _laugh_. She replays the sound in her head, deciding that she likes it.

* * *

The omelet is _surprisingly_ decent. After the first bite, it disappears pretty quickly, as Rey realizes just how starving she is. Ren silently hides behind a book, stretched out on the bed beside her. By the time she is done, it is already getting pretty late and she needs to get home before the last train leaves.

She says her goodbye to Ren, after shimming back into a pair of jeans, his eyes peeking over his book to watch. To which he merely shrugs, "see you around, kid."

Rey leaves the apartment feeling satisfied and just a little better. She heads out into the streets, mindlessly following the usual route to the subway station. So lost in her own thoughts, she doesn't notice the shady character following her….

She doesn't notice until descends the steps to the subway, a grimy hand grabbing her elbow and dragging her off to the corner. Unluckily for her, nobody else appears to be down there but them. His eyes are hard, and unkind as he touches her with his grubby hands. He presses her into the wall, trying to unbutton her jeans. And all her self-defense training goes out the window. Rey _panics._ She flails against him, trying to get away, uselessly.

Her heart pounds in her chest at a frantic, painful rate. Her breathes short and irregular. Is this really happening? _How_ can this be happening? She can't breathe. She _can't breathe._ She opens her mouth to scream, to yell, but only a whimper comes out. He slams her back into the wall, and the room is spinning and spinning…

"What— _What the fuck!"_

The weight is off her in a second, and Rey collapses against the cool cement floor. Her legs are locked down like iron weights… But it doesn't matter because she can't breathe, she can't breathe…

She hears the sound of a struggle… Of a fight, but it is far away, in the distance…. Hands reach for hers, and she flinches. A familiar voice fills her ears, though it sounds more like they are underwater as it comes out gargled. "Rey, _Rey, it's ok… It's ok…."_

But it's not… Because she can't breathe. And all she can hear is blood pounding in her ears.

" _SHIT-FUCK_!" the voice swears. And there is a moment of silence, but a large, warm hand remains on her shoulder. "HELLO? Is this—? Yeah, I got a woman who looks like she's having a panic attack… Fuck, no, listen, she was _attacked_ …. No, no, he's not going anywhere— _listen to me_ we need an ambulance _now…_. Yeah, its— "

Rey blocks out the rest, and tries to focus on counting up to one hundred. Panic attacks were not a mystery to her, as had severe anxiety when she was younger, living in foster care. But it had been a while since she had one. By the time she reached eighty-eight, there was commotion around her. A blanket was wrapped around her. And a young woman smiled warmly at her, guiding her breathing with slow breathes.

After what felt like an eternity, Rey could breathe in slow, very shaking breathes. The young woman smiled at her gently, before looking over her shoulder, pressing the button to the walkie-talkie on her uniform. "I think we are going to need another stretcher down here."

Rey's eyes trail after what caused the remark, and recognizes the man who attacked her, crumpled into a bloody mess in the pavement. It looks like it hurts, but she doesn't feel much sympathy. She remembers the person who rescued her, who sounded familiar… _"Kylo,"_ a voice whispers in her head. And she looks around, as the woman slowly helps her to her feet to guide her onto a gurney. "Where is the— "

The woman seems to know what she is asking, "the man who found you is outside, talking to the police... We're going to take you to the hospital, just to make sure everything is ok. Alright?"

Rey lays down slowly, biting her lip hesitantly.

She adjusts the blanket around Rey, "don't worry, he won't get in trouble."

By the time Rey is turned out topside, Ren, or her rescuer is long gone. The police linger for a statement, and next thing she knows she is being whisked away to the hospital. They administer a slight sedative to calm her shaken nerves.

* * *

When Finn returns home that evening, he arrives in a panic. He throws his keys down, shouting her name, "Rey! Rey!" Having heard the news of her trip to the hospital, as he was listed as her only emergency contact, had shaken him. But by the time he arrived at the hospital, they had released her.

He barges into her room, heart pounding, to find the brunette slowly swaying back and forth to the music blasting from her stereo. He sighs in relief, and leans against the door frame to watch her lethargically sway back and forth, nodding her head to the tune.

" _I saw her today at the reception…"_

Rey turns to face him, and pauses for a moment in shock. She takes in his slow, soft smile and weakly returns the gesture and begins to dance a little more freely to the tune.

 _You can't always get what you want, you can't always get what you want, you can't always get what you want…"_

Finn chuckles fondly at her. He joins her, gently grabbing her by the waist and spinning her around into a tight hug. To which she stops, and sinks into his arms, a soft sob escaping her mouth as she wraps herself around him tightly. He sways gently, rubbing her back as she cries into his shoulder.

"… _But if you try sometimes, you just might find…_ You get what you need _."_


End file.
